Vancouver 2010 Olympic Opening Ceremonies? Bust.
Posted on 12. Feb, 2010 by Ryan Northcott in Olympics, Vancouver 2010
Do you like this story?
We had a chance to show the world who we were, we had a chance to showcase ourselves, we had the world’s attention…what did we do? We effed it up.
Well to be more precise, David Atkins effed it up by making what I like to call the Debbie Downer Olympic opening ceremonies.
I was truly expecting a party, like we know how to do and all we got were a slew of sad songs, a confusing storyline and moments that should have seen the cutting room floor.
Before I rant, there were some highlights that I absolutely adored. K.D. Lang rocked Hallelujah. She was incredible. Little known poet Shane Koyczan inspired me with his poem “We Are More” – in fact his passionate, patriotic poem almost made up for the dismal show, but sadly lost its gusto with horrible speeches. That kid, Shane Koyczan, should be a household name now, that was a beautiful poem. I can’t find the Opening Ceremonies version, but here’s another version of his “We Are More” (transcript) on YouTube:
That’s where the wins end.
The whole cultural display/story was just short of awful. Visually appealing I guess, but in the grand scheme of things it was confusing and dreadfully drawn out. At one point I turned to Tamie and said, “Is Corky from Waiting for Guffman the creative director of this show?”
He wasn’t obviously, but David Atkins and his creative team took whatever Canadian we had and made it weirder than Cirque de Soleil. More to the point was the music selection; a depressing medley of cheesy, epic orchestra music coupled with depressing music from the likes of Sarah Mclachlan, Joni Mitchell, and some french-Canadian guy who I’ve never heard of. K.D. Lang’s selection was equally depressing, but she was amazing, so I can’t fault her. I would like to touch on the punk-fiddling nation we’ve suddenly become with Batman playing the fiddle in a suspended canoe, but I just can’t find the right words to express my puke inducing disgust.
What we should have done was put a big hockey rink in the middle of the stage, a few cold ones under each seat, and had Rush live in concert. Throw in some other Canadian idols who will do something Canadian-y and voila, you would have had a better show. That was rather embarrassing.
With all that trouble, we had a chance to end with a bang. We ended with awkward. Hydraulics weren’t working, or someone fell asleep in the control booth, and the grand torch lighting ceremony was an awkward and far too long exercise in ridiculousness. Lastly, we had our national hero Wayne Gretzky light the actual torch. Unfortunately, this torch was twenty blocks away and showed the world how we will drunkenly chase The Great One holding the torch down the streets of Vancouver on the top of a truck with little to no security in sight. Then, we’ll have Wayne light the torch and leave him here…for the rest of the night. Here you go Wayne, here’s some cab money to get you back.
I’m really hoping this Vancouver 2010 Olympics debacle turns around. First the tragic death of Nodar Kumaritashvili, the Georgian luger and second, the craptastic opening ceremony. I sure hope this doesn’t embarrass us…
I think we can all agree it’s time to get back to our Canadian roots and lower our way too high expectations.
View Comments to “Vancouver 2010 Olympic Opening Ceremonies? Bust.”
Leave a Reply
Vancouver 2010 Winter Olympics? Incredible. | FUDDYTV BLOG | The Literary Musings from the folks behind Chuck Storm and Car Dance Party
Feb 28th, 2010
[...] started off horribly. The death of Georgian luger Nodar Kumaritashvili. The disaster which was the Olympic Opening Ceremonies. The weather wreaking havoc on the events. Our Canadian athletes failing to meet those lofty [...]
Jim
Feb 15th, 2010
I couldn’t agree more.
7 years and millions of dollars to prepare for this ceremony and it turned into a national embarrassment. Too much emphasis on Native Indians also. Why must Canada always try be so politically correct?
Overall, I was very disappointed. although I thought the singers were good, especially KD.
Tami
Feb 15th, 2010
I, for one, think it says a lot more about our country that one of our nation’s biggest stars can be driven down the street without security and no one fears for his safety. And that our citizens were free to run behind him and celebrate without security, guns, boundaries or police barricades blocking the way. It’s a portrayal of Canada that I’m proud the world witnessed.
6X7
Feb 15th, 2010
ok, I have to agree with a few of your points – well, one. KD was great. Oh, and another – Rush would have been really great. But, I do think that the words “debacle” and “embarass” are a bit strong. And, I actually thought the poet guy was a paid spokesperson for Tourism Canada the way he was encouraging the world to come visit. He seemed to be trying a little too hard to be the coolest guy there, which I thought fell a little flat.
And to the person who thought it was odd that Michaelle Jean was front and centre instead of good ‘ol Steven, I suspect it had more to do with the fact that she is the Queen’s rep here in Canada and was officially opening the games rather than the fact that she is beautiful and Haitian.
Alan
Feb 15th, 2010
Wow, strong views guys. Looked alright from this side of the pond, I’m just amazed that Gretzky’s almost 50 now! Legend
Kevin in Toluca Lake
Feb 13th, 2010
Thank God I know this wasn’t a representation of the heart of western Canada. I’ve known western Canadians my whole life and it looks like Mr. Atkins wanted a Toronto-West. I don’t know.
I remember how loving and warm the Calgary Olympics were at the beginning of KD Lang’s career.
Now we’re left with a luge federation blaming the athlete for lack of safety on their own course. Placing steel bars on the course next to a curve? That’s about as smart as going to war with Iraq because of their Weapons of Mass Destruction. Wait…
God Bless that young Georgian, and his family.
Miss you out here Ryan.
Renee
Feb 13th, 2010
How embarassing!
Steve S from Austin
Feb 13th, 2010
I watched the whole thing last night and you have put my feelings into words.
Graham
Feb 13th, 2010
100% Agree with you.
Eamon McKay
Feb 13th, 2010
Please excuse my multiple spelling and gramatical mistakes. I was wrtiting with pure frustration.
Eamon McKay
Feb 13th, 2010
I couldn’t agree more Ryan. I thought we were going to show the world what it is like to live in the greatest country in the world. I expected it to be a low key affair compared to other Olympic opening ceremonies and so it should, but right from the begining things went horrible wrong. They even botched the singing of our national anthem, not following the proper tune slowing it down and adding a line at the end. I knew things were heading in the wrong direction.
They also should have let the Georgian team do a full lap of the building by themselves. I found it very disrespectful to introduce the happy flag waving German team (no fault of theirs) as the somber Georgian team made they around the building.
To your point, we shoudl have kept it simple and had a good old Canadian party.
maryann in toronto
Feb 13th, 2010
Spot on. My husband daughter and I kept looking at each other in disbelief.
It was embarrassing. The empty seats behind our P.M. because the native delegation was late. press people mulling about behind. Cut away shots to the Governor General all the time, what about the P.M.??? Oh I forgot she’s Haitian, beautiful,the typical politically correct thing to do. We have an identity crisis in this country, made very obvious last night. The prairies welcomed the world , fall welcomed the world, and fiddlers???. A few more giant polar bears and northern lights would have sufficed